The shed, the tobacco and the wife

Michael O'Connor from the Wells and Spas Mailing List:

'The best shed I remember belonged to a very old
Gentleman in Pewfall about 50 years ago. He called it
his Bolt Hole, he made directly for it, whenever his
wife and he had too many women visitors. I was
privileged on occasions to be given guided tours of
whatever he was pottering with at the time. One of
which was his "Burglar A-llarum" which consisted of
trip wires connected to an alarm clock mechanism. When
I asked if he had caught any burglars he replied "only
the wife about every 3 weeks".
In those days, in addition to the old age pension,
pensioners received about half an ounce of tobacco a
week or fortnight. The old Gentleman was in the habit
of retiring to his shed with his pipe for an afternoon
nap in an armchair. After a small fire one day, he
received an ultimatum from his wife. "One of three
things will have to go, the shed, the tobacco or me".
The shed and his wife stayed.'